Poem: Screw Up

Heart clenched
Tears fill my eyes
Throat swells.
I can’t breathe
Gut tied in knots.
How do I keep
Trying and failing
Always screwing up
Always failing short?
Oh how
Is anyone
Ever going to be able
To love me?
So imperfect
So foolish
So idiotic.
I long so much
To not feel this pain.
To not be so alone
To have someone
To hold me tight
To remind of the light.
But for now
All I see is darkness.
My great fear
Is that all
I will ever see
Is darkness
All I will ever be
Is forever alone.

Published by Devin Hogg

My name is Devin Hogg. I was born and raised in Carnarvon, Ontario, Canada. I moved to Guelph, Ontario, Canada in 2009 for university and lived here ever since. In my free time, I enjoy reading, watching TV and movies, going on long walks, swimming, and practicing Chen style Tai Chi. I love to write poetry and blog regularly about topics such as mental health, sci-fi/fantasy series, faith, sexuality, and politics.

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